After being matched, we started working directly with the adoption facilitator. We, of course, this time researched the facilitator. They had an excellent reputation, were highly rated by the Better Business Bureau, several adoption experts and several of our friends had worked with them also. We found the facilitator very easy to work with... her goal is of course to support the birth mother so she is focused on making sure that the birth mother’s needs are being met and to be the “go between” on financial matters and any other difficulties between the birthmother and the prospective adoptive parents. The facilitator also works with the hospitals, social workers, and attorneys on behalf of the birth mother. This time we not only were able to talk with the birth mother multiple times before we signed the contract, we were not pressured and were given the time to pray and make an informed decision. (See how different our experience when I was no longer driving… on a side note, I am not known for my driving skills in fact most of my friends prefer that I don’t drive something about not paying attention to the road … too busy talking) Upon being selected by the birth mother and accepting the match, we signed the contract with the facilitator.
All throughout this process, we were in earnest prayer to the Lord regarding following His will and to make sure this time we were on the path that He wanted us to be on. This was a very smooth process that overall matched the adoption budget that the facilitator and advocate gave us (this did not include any of our personal attorney expenses or any expenses related to our State specific laws or travel expenses) ... they give you an adoption budget when they let you know of the prospective situation and ask you if you want to be presented to the birth mother. They also at that time, give you any medical information (like if she took drugs or alcohol during or before the pregnancy... now this information may be false as the source is the birthmother and she could lie if she chooses but it is accurate to the best of the facilitator’s knowledge).